Off tomorrow for new teacher orientation, followed by meetings (?). Not sure how long the day will be, but getting antsy about starting up; I think if I *had* gotten a job last spring, the wait until August would have killed me. Dunno if it's jitters or ennui or something I ate, but I'm feeling nervous, like I'm fighting myself to do anything aside from laying awake in bed sweating about not knowing what the heck to do when Wednesday comes (which is dumb, I know). I'm hoping it'll subside some more once work gets going.
On a more positive note, it was nice to get out and mingle with nice, normal people (Mel's friends are, despite "adult" treehouses and rollerskating parties) and have a reasonable answer when they ask "so what do you do?" It tells me that I put a lot of stock in what I do, as long as it's doing something. Which strikes me as weird, then, when I lack the overwhelming gratitude that I suspected I might be gushing with when I finally found work. It was more, "alright, finally; let's get going." Which led to the aforementioned mental tossing and turning. I'm some weird psychosomatic hypochondriac. I'm hoping once I get a few days under my belt, I'll be more thankful.
But, as often happens, hardships (even supposed ones) are not unaccompanied by joys. My brother comes home to visit on Tuesday.
